Blues Be Gone

I’ve been on the sad side lately, listening to too much Tom Waits and other melancholy music that feeds the mood. I attribute it to a combination of things:

  • My last blog, Damn Dementia, took a lot out of me. Honesty is exhausting. I was astounded by how many of my friends have been impacted by the disease. The conversation was both wonderful and horrible and more than a bit overwhelming.
  • A photo in my feed today from my last visit with my late, great cousin Jill. It’s been seven years, yet it still hit me like a brick. Some people should have more time.  
  • The death of a long time lawyer friend who was living her retirement dreams in Austin, Texas, the live music capital of the world. Some people should have more time.

I know I need to snap out of it and move forward. I know that I will. I’m fortunate my blue phases don’t hit frequently and when they do, I find ways to move through. But it’s not always quick or painless.

Too many tulips are never enough

My antidote is usually beauty. Seeing reminders of the beauty in this world helps me to reframe my brain. How can I be melancholy when something beautiful is right around the corner?

As I type, my neighbor’s kids are playing outside. They’re 8 and 6, screeching in that high-pitched happiness of youth and dancing with unfettered joy.  

When I was a kid, adulting looked so damn easy. They didn’t warn me about the many challenges I’d hit along the way.  Or about the reality of adulting.

But tonight, I’m going to try dancing with unfettered joy.

Ciao,

Lauren J

4 Comments

  1. I saw this quote a few months ago, and I pasted it in my journal so I can look at it regularly.
    Life is amazing. And then it’s awful.
    And then it’s amazing again.
    And in between the amazing and the awful it’s ordinary and mundane and routine.
    Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary.
    That’s just living heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life.
    And it’s breathtakingly beautiful.
    -L. R. Knost
    In the meantime, hang in there and take care of yourself.

    Like

  2. As Jill Blumenthal did, I will also supply a quote as a form of context:

    Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.
    – M. Scott Peck

    Or as someone else said:

    Hang in there, baby !

    Like

Leave a Reply to JIll Blumenthal Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s